A life-long friend of mine just moved from Reno to Renton. He spent summers here as a kid—and has a pretty good idea what to expect. His coworker moved with him who is brand new to the state. He doesn’t know what to expect. But unfortunately, he thinks he knows what to expect. What he moved here for: Alaska Junior. Streams packed with kings, coho, and steelhead (all of which he has never fished for) and a pristine Puget Sound with year-round open seasons on all variety of tasty fish.

Yesterday evening I met my friend's coworker on the shoreline of one of Commencement Bay’s more contaminated fingers. The conversation went like this:

Him: What fish can we catch from shore near here?

Me: Well, I know an area that can hold pile perch and striped perch right around here. Catch and release though—I would not recommend eating anything from this channel.

Awkward silence.

Him: What about salmon?

Me: Well, the Puyallup River is about two miles that way—it has a couple of decent runs for the area. A lot of people who fish it affectionately call it “The Puke.”

Him: What’s a puke-salmon?

We were speaking two different languages. Eventually, we adjusted our dialects and started making sense to each other. My duty as a Washingtonian was to manage his expectations, without popping his balloon. He has never fished for, or caught, a salmon. He would like to do so from the bank somewhere close to his work in King County.

We narrowed it down to the Green. I explained how runs, seasons, closures, gear restrictions, and netting would affect his fishing. I gave him a summary of the various methods of salmon fishing. He was blown away by the concept of corkies—that a mighty king will strike at a green plastic pebble. He wasn’t too familiar with combat fishing, but didn’t like the sound of it.

Someone told him Cohos are the finest eating fish in Washington waters, so he’d really like to catch one. My buddy or I should be able to get him on one this fall. But hopefully it doesn’t come too quick. Beginners’ luck is truly curse. And paradise, to be truly apprecaited, must be earned.